Down we go backward, the entire raft bucking and twisting, the left rear side ( my side) crunching vertically into the hole. Muddy spray washes over us, ripping my breath away. We struggle to stay upright, to keep our paddles out of the hole to prevent our arms being yanked from their sockets by the undertow, to lean in toward the middle of the raft to center our weight.
But for me, ill-prepared and half in the water already, it is no use. The river sandals I borrowed are too loose on my feet and the left one yanks completely free. Nothing now remains to stop that whole leg slipping out from under the seat beside me. I cling precariously to the side, muscles straining, to keep my leg in the boat. The stern of the boat and the rest of my companions are high up above me, huddled like frightened rats on the bucking on the lip of a massive, wicked-looking whirpool.
This stasis endure for several seconds, but it can’t last. The raft isn’t stable enough. It bucks up again, violently. Everyone else manages to cling to their sides. But my side is currently disappearing into the river. My head flies back and straight into the churn.
Now imagine a body bent backward over the side with his head stuck in the whitewater (photo: Wikipedia)
The roaring stops: the world becomes a totality of white and green and muffled sound. I hear my brother to my left, yelling, and feel his grip on my arm and leg. He’s trying to pull my upper body back up and in – something the guide had warned us not to do in a hole this huge, as it would simply cause everyone else to fall in.
With the raft at a 45 degree angle I don’t have the strength to pull my head back up out of the sucking whirpool. And I’m not about to drown here, bent backward over the edge of a raft, one leg straight up, one still stuck uselessly under the seat. That’s just not a dignified way to die.
I also don’t feel like being the cause of everyone else going over into the undertow with me. So I yank my right leg as hard as I can. The sandal rips free. My legs fly up. I somersault backward into the churning hole.
Chaos. Somehow I manage to right myself and thrust my head slightly out of the water, struggle to gasp a few breaths. Immediately I’m sucked downward into the whirpool, outward toward the rock ledge lining the bank of the river – spinning in a pressurized void of green and white. I try to swim against the undertow to no avail. How deep is this hole anyway?
My eyes fly open. The rock ledge. Getting pinned by the current under submerged rock ledges are how people drown, and the ledge is close. In only a few seconds the undertow will drag me under it. And I may not have the breath to fight back.
In a surge of pure adrenaline I heave my feet out from under my body and position them in front of me. I plant them firmly, flat against the edge of the rock wall and push mightily away from the ledge with all my remaining strength.
I shoot out back into the main current, out of the hole. Finally I surface, gasping raggedly, taking in as much spray as oxygen. But I’m not dead.
Safe out of the hole at least, now I just need to survive the remainder of this stretch of Class IV rapids without knocking myself out on a boulder. I struggle to get breath, get turned around with my feet in front of me like the guides have demonstrated so that none of my tender bits are smashed by the rocks and slabs.
My lungs cannot seem to get enough air. Endless moments pass during which I have no idea when I will take my next breath. As soon as I surface, I slide over a rock or plunge down another hole and am pulled down again. I drink a good portion of the previous night’s rainfall.
I could probably tell you to this day, if you served me up a glass of pure Pacuare river water, exactly which rapid it came from within a couple of river miles. (“Ah yes,” I would say, swilling the glass and smacking my lips. “The Mangler rapids. A fine vintage, I would know it anywhere…”)
Things are getting desperate. At the edges of my vision – eyes fixed wildly open in the rushing water, a churn of green and white foam and bubbles – dull black tendrils begin to creep.
I launch my head savagely toward the open air, gasp a long breath. Only now am I aware that my calves and bare feet are absorbing impact after impact from the stones and boulders I’m navigating.
A rock cracks against my tailbone. I careen down a mini-waterfall, my legs jolting as my feet hit the river bottom.
Sort of like me in the rapid, but with more rocks and less drowning. (photo: c. Wayne Hacker, warrenimages.com)
Suddenly, the blessed red safety kayak is there. I feel it gliding smoothly up against my right side. I grasp blindly out for the edge and cling to the front. “Hang on, amigo!”, the kayaker shouts.
As if I would do anything else. Um, no, amigo, that’s ok, I’m really enjoying my blind morning hurtle through this concealed boulder field, thanks anyway.
Rocks and branches fly past as my body is swiftly transported to the far end of the rapids. I’m deposited, dazed and heaving for breath, on a wide sandy shore fringed with reeds and stumpy banana trees. The kayaker sticks a goofy thumbs-up sign toward me, shoots downstream to look for more “swimmers”.